I promised The Clock I would not rescind my love for him.

I'm listening to my neighbor talk to his girlfriend on the phone.

It sounds like she wants to start a business, and she seems to be talking about the cost involved. I didn't realize this until a few minutes into the conversation, however. Initially, I thought he was giving her advice on getting some sort of help for herself. He kept saying things about when you're miserable, you do what needs to be done, to stop making excuses, and something or other is only a distraction from what's most important.

I thought to myself, huh. That's really forward of him, and it's nice he's not mollycoddling her.

Then I heard, "Get your shit together, woman. You can budget out your drugs for a month or two, and when you see your name on a website, you'll know it was worth it."

I don't. Fucking. Even. I'd say that aren't words, but that would be an obvious lie.

I didn't run again tonight. That's three nights in a row. I Skyped with Amber instead. We sat and talked for two hours. I'm going to run tomorrow after my thing. I went for a walk tonight, though. And I wanted to run, but I was in flip flops, and I had my purse, and then I remembered how tired I feel and how my back hurts and holy fuck, I'm turning 29 in a few days.

I've become rather addicted to A Softer World. I've been going through them all day. I found several that really hit home for me, alt-text and all, and I emailed them to myself so I wouldn't forget them.

I'm trying to talk myself into going out and taking photos tomorrow! I have some sparklers here, and I'd like to try a long exposure with those, because I've seen some that look really, really neat. I'm also still working on the low-key photos starring my very own face.

My neighbor and his girlfriend are arguing now. He's flinging his keys about in his hand, I can hear them jingling and thudding against his palm.

"There's a time to watch out for feelings, and there's a time to be true to oneself."

He said that and hung up on her.

I don't...I'm bemused. I wish I could have heard the entire conversation.